i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
