so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
