what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Randomize
