maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Randomize
