And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
Randomize
