yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
