i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
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