we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Blow job season was short but glorious.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Fuck me I smell like cheese
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
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