if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Mom said you looked used
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
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