just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
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