I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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