Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
He is an equal opportunity slut.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize
