the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
She announced her abortion via fbk
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Randomize
