Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
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