You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
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