Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
Randomize
