I got chris browned last night
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize