i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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