i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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