Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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