my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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