Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
