well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
