nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize