i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
