You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
