I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
i think i have herpe
just one?
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
