I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize