I wish I could punch you in the face.
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
