Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Randomize
