Say something about gay babies.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Randomize
