I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Please don't give away my fajitas
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
