No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
I cut my penus on the lid.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
Randomize
