We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize