Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
