My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Randomize
