Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Randomize
