there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
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