Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Randomize
