what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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