Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
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