I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
