Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
Everclear isn't food dammit
Randomize
