She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
