my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
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