We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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