Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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