didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
Just sold all of my pants in order to buy tonight's whiskey. Goodbye, high functioning alcoholism. Hello, Dad.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Randomize
