This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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