so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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