He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
